bangs head
Nov. 4th, 2002 10:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eliabrithJust when i feel as though i get something done something happens to pull the rug out from under me. For some reason my credit card doesn't seem to be accepting bills at the min AOL can't get this months payment despite getting it for months while Amazon couldn't get payment last week and I ahd to switch it to my mums card.
Anyway reasons to feel accomplished got the Inland Revenue form done finally and drum roll please .......
finally spent the bulk of 4 hours typing Warnings: As ever unbeta'd for those that did suggest I get someone to beta read it, I will i promise but not just yet I want to at least be able to see light at the end. And then i can sit and do the fine tooth combing needed and repost the thing.
Notes: Sorry for how long this has taken first to be written, then lost, then found, then another bit lost, then found and then finally typed up, but thats what you get when its spread between file pages, (surprisingly in a file) a BHS napkin, (cos i didn't have any paper on me when i suddenly decided to write whilst killing time before my plane in Glasgow city center, and an A6 notebook i bought outta Woolies when i ran outta napkin.
Anyway I hope it won't take a year (and a bit ahem) for the next part to surface from the depths of my brain. Thanks to the people still reading and sending feedback, so on with the story.
Previous chapters can be found at either http://www.area52hkh.net or http://members.lycos.co.uk/scottish_slashers/index.html or at http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=163620
Second Chances Part 8
Jack O'Neill nodded to a nurse as he walked along the hospita; corridor before pausing to rap his knuckles against the doorframe of the room he wanted.
Daniel looked up sharply at the sound but remained silent, the expression on his face unreadable. Jack glanced away briefly and swallowed before looking back at the figure in the bed.
"Ah... Can I come in?" A silent shrug was his only reply before Daniel turned to watch out the window again.
"Thanks." Jack murmmered as he stepped into the room and made his way to a chair pulling it round to face the bed before sitting down and dropping the bag he brought on the floor.
"Uh," He fumbled for something to say, "So how's the food here? It OK? cos I know hospital ood ain't always the best." Again the only response Jack received was an indifferent shrug, Daniel hadn't even bothered to face him. Jack glanced about the room trying to think of something that would get a proper response. He frowned slightly turning towards his silent companion.
"Do you know who I am?"
"you where here when i woke up" The voice was quiet and seemed very young.
"Yes I was."
"another doctor?" Jack was confused at the slight hopefulness he heard in the tone and in the eyes that for the first time where focused on him.
"No."
Daniel's shoulders slumped even further and his voice lost almost all its volume.
"a social worker to put me in another home?"
"What?! No!" Jack cried out, regreting the outbourst imediately as Daniel flinched away and practically cowered in the corner of his bed arms raised instinctivly, as if to ward off a blow.
"It's OK. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you." Daniel lowered his arms uncertainly and glanced back towards Jack . "I'm sorry. " he repeated, "You aren't going to be shipped off to a home. And I'm Jack by the way." He smiled reassuringly and held out his waiting for Daniel to take it, which he hesitantly did.
"How do you know me then?"
Jack was heartened by the first glimpses of curiosity in Daniels face.
"Uh, I'm not exactly sure what I should tell you. What's the Doc told ya?"
"Nothing much, they keep making me do tests but won't tell me anything."
"Well I need to go speak to Doctor Fraiser so I'll see what I can find out for you OK? And in the meantime you can look through these, I wasn't sure what you'd like so I brought a selection."
Jack reached down to grab the brown paper bag he'd placed on the floor earlier and tossed it onto the side of the bed wincing at Daniels surprised flinch.
"Sorry." He said softly, before tipping the contents out on the sheets beside Daniel, Hersey Kisses, Mars bars, packets of skittles and gummi bears spilled out amongst other varieties of candy.
"You can pick what you want, and if theres any you don't like I'm sure I can think of somewhere to put them." Jack grinned and bobbed his eyebrows, his grin widened slightly when he saw a ghost of a smile quirk at the corner of Daniels mouth. He stood streching. "Well I'll be back in a while after I've spoken to the Doc, OK?" A quick nod was his reply as he turned to exit the room.
***
"Has he changed his mind yet?"
The question roused Janet Fraiser from her rather dark thoughts and she turned to face Samantha Carter standing in the office doorway. She shook her head slowly.
"No. I've tried listing all the reasons as to why Daniel would be better off in a care unit but I can't change his mind. I agree with him that it would be better for Daniel to be in a familar environment but thats nolonger feasible as what is familar to Daniel isn't here anymore, and Jack just doesn't have he nessesary experience to look after him by himself." She sighed. "Hows he been at the mountain?"
Sam came into the office and perched on the desk.
"He's got SG-1 on stand down at the minute and he's been avoiding us entirely for the past few days scine he told us his intentions towards Daniels care."
"He's been avoiding me too, I couldnt find him anywhere yesterday, on base, or at home."
"Well he's here now so you can stop talking about me."
Both women started and spun to face the door where Jack was leaning against the frame, his legs crossed at his ankles
"Colonel." Sam nodded.
"Colonel O'Neill." Janet motioned for him to take a seat.
"Well since you have things to discuss I'll make myself scarce and go visit Daniel." with that Sam turned and left the room closing the door behind her.
Before Janet had a chance to open her mouth Jack spoke up.
"I can learn what I need to know to look after him, I know Daniel we'll manage just fine."
Janet shook her head, this was going as she'd expected. "No you knew the adult Daniel this is a completly new person who cannot be left on his own for any lenght of time. What would you do about work?"
"Well I can do most of the paperwork from home and I've been looking at getting a carer in for days when I have to go to the base if I can't take him with me."
"What about when you're off world? What if something happens to you then? Daniek is going to need complete stability. You can't just keep dissappearing on him and leaving him with strangers, thats your whole argument against putting him in a home, not wanting him to be shuffled around." Janet paused to give her words time to sink in. Jack glanced away and shifted nervously
"Ummm."
Janet watched his reactions and a cold feeling settled in her gut.
"Jack what have you done?" she asked suspiciously.
"I won't be going off planet unless absolutly nessesary or unless Thor decides to swing by again." he shot her a small smile, So I can keep fairly regular hours and as I said most of it can be done from home."
"You're taking a desk job? Sam never said anything."
"She doesn't know yet, it's not finalisted, I'm meeting with Hammond later. If he says no I can always retire, again." He gave a wry smile.
"Jack you love SG-1, and this will put a lot of pressure on you, you could end up regretting this and resent Daniel for it."
"You mean especially if this is a guilt provoked reaction. It's not and I won't resent him. Yes I feel some responsibility, but that is mostly for the argument we had, if we hadn't been about to leave he would have been in the temple anyway when the quake hit. He got shuffled around as you said till he went to college the first time he was growing up, SG-1 was the first real stability he had for most of his life. I want that to continue or start over again in Daniels case." He sighed, "I dropped into see him on my way up, he did speak to me after a bit, but i didn't know what to tell him, he says he doesn't know whats going on, no one will tell him whats happening, its scaring him more and I didn't know what to say so I said I had to talk to you first."
Janet sighed and rubbed her nose and forehead before looking back up at Jack.
"Well its not like the more common amnesia, we can't not just say anything amd wait for the memories to surface because all the tests and the experts say that we're as sure as we can be that they won't surface so telling him at least the basics will be nessesary."
"He has to know who I am if he's going to live with me."
Janet smiled wanly.
"Jack how much do you know about Daniels life in the various homes and foster families that he grew up in?"
"I know bits and peices, he was shipped around alot never really fitting in with other kids. I know he was beaten several times by one of his foster fathers at one point and another of the kids died there but i'm not sure exactly when that happened."
Janet blinked and sat in silence for a few minutes, she took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"I hadn't known about the death but from questioning Daniel I'd say those events happened a few months ago as far as Daniel's memory is concerned. When did you find out about the abuse?"
"When he first came back from Abydos, well more after Chulak. He was all mixed up and upset over Sha're, he had nightmares over a lot of things from Sha're, his parents death the first mission to Abydo and Lena's death, that was the kids name I think, we ended up spending most nights for a few weeks exorcising demons from both our pasts in the hope we could get some uninterupted sleep."
She nodded. "I think you can expect more nightmares this time. As far as he's concerned the memories are fresh and probably would account for the fact that he's not slept the night through since he regained conciousness. Did he tell you how she died?"
"Daniel knocked something over and Evans, I think he was called or something like that, hit him I'm not sure how Lena came into it but she ended up being knocked down a flight of stairs which broke her neck. Daniel's always felt guilty, she was younger than him and he thinks he should have protected her."
Janet swallowed, "It certainly explains why he's so nervous around people especially with the male staff. she sighed.
***
Sam was leaving Daniels room as they started down the corridor.
"Sam." Janet called out to her friend. Sam turned and started up the corridor towards them.
"Hey Carter, how's the patient?"
"Silent. He didn't say a word to me the entire time, the most I got was a nod or shake of his head when I asked him a direct question. He was more interested in picking at a paper bag he had half stuffed under his pillow." She shrugged looking depressed, Janet patted her arm comfortingly.
"He's not been speaking to anyone unless he's told to answer the questions for evaluation." she smiled slightly.
Jack tried to lighten the mood.
"We couldn't shut the adult Daniel up, we can't get young Daniel to talk at all most timkes where's the happy medium?"
Janet rolled her eyes.
"Nonsense he just needs some time." She turned back to Sam, "The Colonel and I need to speak to Daniel. How about I meet you in the Cafeteria in a while for coffee?"
"Okay."
"What I don't get coffee?"
This time it was Sam that rolled her eyes.
"You can get you're own, Sir." She turned and head for the cafeteria, Janet watched her go before motioning for them to continue.
"Shall we?"
Jack was getting nervous as they approched Daniels room, all sorts of little doubts running through his head "what if this Daniel didn't like him, what if Daniel didn't want to live with him, what if he couldn't be the person that Daniel needed him to be?" He shook his head to clear it as they entered and shut the door behind them.
"Hey Daniel, I asked the Doc what was going on but it confused me so I briught her down for you to interrogate." The light tone of voice brought another ghostly half smile to Daniels face.
Janet blinked in surprise the faint smile was the most expression she'd seen on an otherwise blank face since Daniel had woken up almost a week before. She sat down in the chair leaving Jack slouching against the wall .
"Ok Daniel. I'll try my best to explain it all to you. I know you've been told that you've lost some of her memory so what is it you want to know?"
"What happened to me?"
"You where working at a dig when there was an accident that resulted in your almost total memory loss."
"So I am.. was an archeologist."
"Yes."
Daniel glanced around with a slight frown on his face.
"How old am, was.." He trailed off in confusion, eyes flicking towards Jack who smiled slightly in reassurance. Janet sighed, this was going to be confusing.
"Daniel," she paused waiting for his full attention. "Daniel at... right now, you are your 12 year old self but phyisically your body is 36 years old."
Daniel's response was a blink before his face lost all animation and returned to the blank mask. before he turned his attention back to gazing out the window again. Janet stared at the back of Daniel's head for a few moments.
"I'll leave now but I'll come back later to check on you, so if you've thought of anything else you can ask then. Ok?"
There was no reply but she took the silence as agreement. She rose, opened the door and glanced at Jack in query. He shook his head and indicated that he'd stay a while longer, she pulled the door behind her. Jack looked at the still figure for a moment longer before crossing to the chair and settled in for a long wait, if Daniel wanted to talk he would and if he wanted to sit in silence then that was alright too.
To be continued.... hopefully in the near future. Enjoy, anyone whos been waiting for it.
Anyway reasons to feel accomplished got the Inland Revenue form done finally and drum roll please .......
finally spent the bulk of 4 hours typing Warnings: As ever unbeta'd for those that did suggest I get someone to beta read it, I will i promise but not just yet I want to at least be able to see light at the end. And then i can sit and do the fine tooth combing needed and repost the thing.
Notes: Sorry for how long this has taken first to be written, then lost, then found, then another bit lost, then found and then finally typed up, but thats what you get when its spread between file pages, (surprisingly in a file) a BHS napkin, (cos i didn't have any paper on me when i suddenly decided to write whilst killing time before my plane in Glasgow city center, and an A6 notebook i bought outta Woolies when i ran outta napkin.
Anyway I hope it won't take a year (and a bit ahem) for the next part to surface from the depths of my brain. Thanks to the people still reading and sending feedback, so on with the story.
Previous chapters can be found at either http://www.area52hkh.net or http://members.lycos.co.uk/scottish_slashers/index.html or at http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=163620
Second Chances Part 8
Jack O'Neill nodded to a nurse as he walked along the hospita; corridor before pausing to rap his knuckles against the doorframe of the room he wanted.
Daniel looked up sharply at the sound but remained silent, the expression on his face unreadable. Jack glanced away briefly and swallowed before looking back at the figure in the bed.
"Ah... Can I come in?" A silent shrug was his only reply before Daniel turned to watch out the window again.
"Thanks." Jack murmmered as he stepped into the room and made his way to a chair pulling it round to face the bed before sitting down and dropping the bag he brought on the floor.
"Uh," He fumbled for something to say, "So how's the food here? It OK? cos I know hospital ood ain't always the best." Again the only response Jack received was an indifferent shrug, Daniel hadn't even bothered to face him. Jack glanced about the room trying to think of something that would get a proper response. He frowned slightly turning towards his silent companion.
"Do you know who I am?"
"you where here when i woke up" The voice was quiet and seemed very young.
"Yes I was."
"another doctor?" Jack was confused at the slight hopefulness he heard in the tone and in the eyes that for the first time where focused on him.
"No."
Daniel's shoulders slumped even further and his voice lost almost all its volume.
"a social worker to put me in another home?"
"What?! No!" Jack cried out, regreting the outbourst imediately as Daniel flinched away and practically cowered in the corner of his bed arms raised instinctivly, as if to ward off a blow.
"It's OK. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you." Daniel lowered his arms uncertainly and glanced back towards Jack . "I'm sorry. " he repeated, "You aren't going to be shipped off to a home. And I'm Jack by the way." He smiled reassuringly and held out his waiting for Daniel to take it, which he hesitantly did.
"How do you know me then?"
Jack was heartened by the first glimpses of curiosity in Daniels face.
"Uh, I'm not exactly sure what I should tell you. What's the Doc told ya?"
"Nothing much, they keep making me do tests but won't tell me anything."
"Well I need to go speak to Doctor Fraiser so I'll see what I can find out for you OK? And in the meantime you can look through these, I wasn't sure what you'd like so I brought a selection."
Jack reached down to grab the brown paper bag he'd placed on the floor earlier and tossed it onto the side of the bed wincing at Daniels surprised flinch.
"Sorry." He said softly, before tipping the contents out on the sheets beside Daniel, Hersey Kisses, Mars bars, packets of skittles and gummi bears spilled out amongst other varieties of candy.
"You can pick what you want, and if theres any you don't like I'm sure I can think of somewhere to put them." Jack grinned and bobbed his eyebrows, his grin widened slightly when he saw a ghost of a smile quirk at the corner of Daniels mouth. He stood streching. "Well I'll be back in a while after I've spoken to the Doc, OK?" A quick nod was his reply as he turned to exit the room.
***
"Has he changed his mind yet?"
The question roused Janet Fraiser from her rather dark thoughts and she turned to face Samantha Carter standing in the office doorway. She shook her head slowly.
"No. I've tried listing all the reasons as to why Daniel would be better off in a care unit but I can't change his mind. I agree with him that it would be better for Daniel to be in a familar environment but thats nolonger feasible as what is familar to Daniel isn't here anymore, and Jack just doesn't have he nessesary experience to look after him by himself." She sighed. "Hows he been at the mountain?"
Sam came into the office and perched on the desk.
"He's got SG-1 on stand down at the minute and he's been avoiding us entirely for the past few days scine he told us his intentions towards Daniels care."
"He's been avoiding me too, I couldnt find him anywhere yesterday, on base, or at home."
"Well he's here now so you can stop talking about me."
Both women started and spun to face the door where Jack was leaning against the frame, his legs crossed at his ankles
"Colonel." Sam nodded.
"Colonel O'Neill." Janet motioned for him to take a seat.
"Well since you have things to discuss I'll make myself scarce and go visit Daniel." with that Sam turned and left the room closing the door behind her.
Before Janet had a chance to open her mouth Jack spoke up.
"I can learn what I need to know to look after him, I know Daniel we'll manage just fine."
Janet shook her head, this was going as she'd expected. "No you knew the adult Daniel this is a completly new person who cannot be left on his own for any lenght of time. What would you do about work?"
"Well I can do most of the paperwork from home and I've been looking at getting a carer in for days when I have to go to the base if I can't take him with me."
"What about when you're off world? What if something happens to you then? Daniek is going to need complete stability. You can't just keep dissappearing on him and leaving him with strangers, thats your whole argument against putting him in a home, not wanting him to be shuffled around." Janet paused to give her words time to sink in. Jack glanced away and shifted nervously
"Ummm."
Janet watched his reactions and a cold feeling settled in her gut.
"Jack what have you done?" she asked suspiciously.
"I won't be going off planet unless absolutly nessesary or unless Thor decides to swing by again." he shot her a small smile, So I can keep fairly regular hours and as I said most of it can be done from home."
"You're taking a desk job? Sam never said anything."
"She doesn't know yet, it's not finalisted, I'm meeting with Hammond later. If he says no I can always retire, again." He gave a wry smile.
"Jack you love SG-1, and this will put a lot of pressure on you, you could end up regretting this and resent Daniel for it."
"You mean especially if this is a guilt provoked reaction. It's not and I won't resent him. Yes I feel some responsibility, but that is mostly for the argument we had, if we hadn't been about to leave he would have been in the temple anyway when the quake hit. He got shuffled around as you said till he went to college the first time he was growing up, SG-1 was the first real stability he had for most of his life. I want that to continue or start over again in Daniels case." He sighed, "I dropped into see him on my way up, he did speak to me after a bit, but i didn't know what to tell him, he says he doesn't know whats going on, no one will tell him whats happening, its scaring him more and I didn't know what to say so I said I had to talk to you first."
Janet sighed and rubbed her nose and forehead before looking back up at Jack.
"Well its not like the more common amnesia, we can't not just say anything amd wait for the memories to surface because all the tests and the experts say that we're as sure as we can be that they won't surface so telling him at least the basics will be nessesary."
"He has to know who I am if he's going to live with me."
Janet smiled wanly.
"Jack how much do you know about Daniels life in the various homes and foster families that he grew up in?"
"I know bits and peices, he was shipped around alot never really fitting in with other kids. I know he was beaten several times by one of his foster fathers at one point and another of the kids died there but i'm not sure exactly when that happened."
Janet blinked and sat in silence for a few minutes, she took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"I hadn't known about the death but from questioning Daniel I'd say those events happened a few months ago as far as Daniel's memory is concerned. When did you find out about the abuse?"
"When he first came back from Abydos, well more after Chulak. He was all mixed up and upset over Sha're, he had nightmares over a lot of things from Sha're, his parents death the first mission to Abydo and Lena's death, that was the kids name I think, we ended up spending most nights for a few weeks exorcising demons from both our pasts in the hope we could get some uninterupted sleep."
She nodded. "I think you can expect more nightmares this time. As far as he's concerned the memories are fresh and probably would account for the fact that he's not slept the night through since he regained conciousness. Did he tell you how she died?"
"Daniel knocked something over and Evans, I think he was called or something like that, hit him I'm not sure how Lena came into it but she ended up being knocked down a flight of stairs which broke her neck. Daniel's always felt guilty, she was younger than him and he thinks he should have protected her."
Janet swallowed, "It certainly explains why he's so nervous around people especially with the male staff. she sighed.
***
Sam was leaving Daniels room as they started down the corridor.
"Sam." Janet called out to her friend. Sam turned and started up the corridor towards them.
"Hey Carter, how's the patient?"
"Silent. He didn't say a word to me the entire time, the most I got was a nod or shake of his head when I asked him a direct question. He was more interested in picking at a paper bag he had half stuffed under his pillow." She shrugged looking depressed, Janet patted her arm comfortingly.
"He's not been speaking to anyone unless he's told to answer the questions for evaluation." she smiled slightly.
Jack tried to lighten the mood.
"We couldn't shut the adult Daniel up, we can't get young Daniel to talk at all most timkes where's the happy medium?"
Janet rolled her eyes.
"Nonsense he just needs some time." She turned back to Sam, "The Colonel and I need to speak to Daniel. How about I meet you in the Cafeteria in a while for coffee?"
"Okay."
"What I don't get coffee?"
This time it was Sam that rolled her eyes.
"You can get you're own, Sir." She turned and head for the cafeteria, Janet watched her go before motioning for them to continue.
"Shall we?"
Jack was getting nervous as they approched Daniels room, all sorts of little doubts running through his head "what if this Daniel didn't like him, what if Daniel didn't want to live with him, what if he couldn't be the person that Daniel needed him to be?" He shook his head to clear it as they entered and shut the door behind them.
"Hey Daniel, I asked the Doc what was going on but it confused me so I briught her down for you to interrogate." The light tone of voice brought another ghostly half smile to Daniels face.
Janet blinked in surprise the faint smile was the most expression she'd seen on an otherwise blank face since Daniel had woken up almost a week before. She sat down in the chair leaving Jack slouching against the wall .
"Ok Daniel. I'll try my best to explain it all to you. I know you've been told that you've lost some of her memory so what is it you want to know?"
"What happened to me?"
"You where working at a dig when there was an accident that resulted in your almost total memory loss."
"So I am.. was an archeologist."
"Yes."
Daniel glanced around with a slight frown on his face.
"How old am, was.." He trailed off in confusion, eyes flicking towards Jack who smiled slightly in reassurance. Janet sighed, this was going to be confusing.
"Daniel," she paused waiting for his full attention. "Daniel at... right now, you are your 12 year old self but phyisically your body is 36 years old."
Daniel's response was a blink before his face lost all animation and returned to the blank mask. before he turned his attention back to gazing out the window again. Janet stared at the back of Daniel's head for a few moments.
"I'll leave now but I'll come back later to check on you, so if you've thought of anything else you can ask then. Ok?"
There was no reply but she took the silence as agreement. She rose, opened the door and glanced at Jack in query. He shook his head and indicated that he'd stay a while longer, she pulled the door behind her. Jack looked at the still figure for a moment longer before crossing to the chair and settled in for a long wait, if Daniel wanted to talk he would and if he wanted to sit in silence then that was alright too.
To be continued.... hopefully in the near future. Enjoy, anyone whos been waiting for it.
